It's SOUPER hot outside, but I'm ready for Telephone Tortilla Soup!

My last post was back in June.  I was bemoaning the horrible weather, as I always do around that time of year.  We're a few days shy of October and it's STILL hot here.

Seriously, is this a joke?  Has Yahoo! decided that they're going to see how crazy I can become if they keep reporting these jacked-up weather forecasts?  For those of you who have never experienced life in the desert, you must know that hearing the air conditioner running only DAYS before October is stomach-churning.

Okay, I feel better now.  I just really need for you all who are outside of the Valley of Flames to understand just how ridiculous it is here.

So, this post is all about one of the many joys I am lucky enough to have in my life.  I have many, but this is all about the tortilla soup.  Some of you know that when I was first introduced to this soup by my brother and sister-in-law, via our friend Sarah, I made it at LEAST once a month, but more like every few weeks.  Yes, it's just THAT amazing!   And it's not like there's a lot to it that's bad for you!  Just try to steer clear of additives (salt, cheese, sour cream, chips....but I don't).

The funny thing about this soup is that it SHOULD be called Telephone Tortilla Soup.  Here's why.  Sarah got the recipe from her mom (is that right, Sarah?).  Sarah gave it to Tim and Julie.  They told me the recipe, verbally, and I made it, not calling them to make sure I had everything correct.  When I described to Sarah what I had done, the recipe was quite a bit different than hers.  That gave us the idea of possibly having a Telephone Tortilla Soup exchange.  Fun, right?  I'd do it!  Heck, I can do it right now because the recipe I'm about to give you will make enough for you to feed four people and have leftovers for a few nights.  Here we go (pictures first, recipe at the bottom).

Here are the ingredients:

 Got that?  No?  Don't worry, I took LOTS of pictures.

Let's get started.  You'll need a stock pot and a fry pan.

Step one:  Put the stock pot on the stove and fill it with the canned items and chicken broth.

 Chop up the cilantro:

 Add the cilantro to the pot:

 Turn the burner on low to medium, just to start warming up the contents of the stock pot.

Next, bust out the fry pan and add these two items:

 That's about two tbsp. minced garlic (I have a BIG jar of it I keep in the fridge for just such an emergency) and about a tbsp. of my beloved Country Crock.  Feel free to omit the buttery goodness if you can sauté without it.  I, for one, cannot.

Next, get ready to cry!  Chop the onion.

I usually just peel the outer skin, chop the onion in half and then start making nice, thin slices.

Add the onion to the fry pan with about a half tbsp of cumin:

Saute that stuff up until the onions are translucent.  Personally, I like to wait until the onions start to brown on the edges a bit.  But, it matters not.  This soup is all about preference, peeps!

See the brown edges?  Yum!

Add the mixture to the soup.  Is this still easy or are you feeling it's too involved?  I know, it seems involved, but it's not.  Trust me.  The end result is TOTALLY worth it.

Next, let's throw in the corn just for fun:

Oooooh, pretty!  At this point, you'll see lots of fun and festive colors popping up in your soup.

Crank up the heat to about medium.  Let's get this soup rolling.  

I really do wish this picture could do justice to the way this soup was rolling.  

Now, it's time to throw in the rice.  BROWN rice, people!  NOT white rice.  I don't have anything against white rice, but just trust me.  Or ask my sister-in-law, Tracy.  I told her to put in two handfuls of rice.  That works great when it's brown, but white?  Nope.  We both learned a great lesson that day.  So, throw in two handfuls of brown rice and stir:

 Keep the boil rolling for about five minutes.  Then, turn down the heat to low and cover it.  Let it sit.  I don't know if 30 minutes is enough, but I know that it can go three hours on low if need be.

About 30 minutes before you're ready to serve it up, add the chicken.  Now, for ease, I usually buy a rotisserie chicken, pick it clean and stick it in the fridge till I'm ready to dump it in.

Yes, that seemed like WAY too many steps to keep you interested.  I'm sorry!  But, truly, once you make it JUST ONCE, you'll see that I just love to post pictures.  It's really easy, I promise!

So, now, you're ready to serve your soup!  "But Leanne, what garnishes do you use?"  Oh, I'm so glad you asked!

I like lots of different things, but my standby toppings are these lovely items:

 

 Some people like to use fresh cut tomatoes, shredded cheese, raw onions...you name it!  The best thing about this soup is that it's so versatile.

           

 Soooo delicious!  Hopefully, if you've already made this soup, you'll be so kind as to leave your variations in the comments section.  I love to hear how much this soup evolves.  I've also substituted the chicken for fried ground beef and added some taco seasoning and a can of enchilada sauce to the soup. Taco soup, anyone?

Now here's the recipe:

Start by throwing this into the pot:

2   14 oz. cans black beans
1   14 oz. can diced tomatoes w/ green chiles
1   8 oz. can El Pato (or substitute w/ tomato sauce for less heat)
12 cups chicken broth (that's about 3 of those cardboard containers)
1 bunch cilantro, chopped well
1 lb. bag frozen sweet white corn (or canned, if you prefer...which I do NOT)

Meanwhile, sauté the following in a fry pan and add to the pot:

1 yellow onion
1-2 tbsp. minced garlic
1/2 tbsp. cumin
1/2 tbsp. butter (for sautéing)

Turn up the heat and get the soup to a rolling boil.  Add 1/2 cup brown rice, stir and continue to boil for about 5 minutes.

Turn down heat to a simmer and 1 rotisserie chicken, picked clean about 20-30 minutes before serving.

Enjoy!

It's hot and I'm lazy.

I straight-up hate Summer.  My power bill is always ridiculously high, my parts get too sweaty and every beautiful thing I tended and cared for in my garden only a few short weeks ago is now incinerated.  The heat makes me lazy.  I'm so lazy that I'm putting forth almost no effort in typing today's entry.

Last night after dinner, the kids wanted to make S'mores.  Ew.  Nothing more fun than roasting marshmallows in the lovely 95º evening air.  Barf.  I did this instead and now I'm going to share the simple recipe with you.  Mostly because I love you, but a little bit of it has to do with the fact that I don't like being lazy alone.  Something about laziness loving company.

Here you go.  Enjoy!

One cup of chips to one tbsp. Crisco, nuked for about one minute.  Stir

I used toffee bits to keep the keep these standing up so they chocolate could dry.  Next time I'm just going to try pouring the chocolate over each sandwich.  

Spring Cleaning

See!  This is exactly why I didn't want to blog in the first place!  It's been two months since my last post.  I feel like such a failure....almost.

So, the husband is offshore and my orthopedic surgeon has given me the thumbs up to "do whatever I want" in regards to my broken arm.  Yay!  So, this created an avalanche of ideas in my head.  I have to get the veggie garden planted, finish crochet projects I started before the 'incident', redesign the twins bedrooms, dust the ceiling fans, wash the base boards, add extra shelves to the laundry room and pantry, put together the twins summer homeschooling curriculum and finish the various Pinterest projects I have laying around in various states of completion.

I will really do just about ANYTHING to avoid going back into the workforce, won't I?  Yes.  Yes, I will.

 The veggie garden is weeded, but not yet planted, I've finished most of my crochet projects, I have bedding for the twins rooms (but no idea for paint, wall decor or shelves), ceiling fans will have to wait till tomorrow, base board cleaning will be a great opportunity for the twins to earn some scratch, shelves for the laundry room and pantry...I think I'll defer to the husband for that one, homeschooling curriculum will be an all-day thing for next week...blah blah blah....BUT....I finished a Pinterest project today!

I KNOW!!!  I'm just as excited as you!  I'm fodder for Bill Maher's genius stand-up, that's for sure, but I feel accomplished and that's all that matters!

I made THAT wreath.  You know the one.  The terra cotta pot wreath!  It's all over Pinterest and it's FABULOUS!  Plus, it's easy.  So, go ahead and buy some supplies, slap one together and feel as accomplished as I do.  You won't be sorry.  Next thing you know, you'll be making black bean brownies and avocado chocolate pudding (coincidentally, my next fun recipe to try).

I Shot The Duck and the Damned Thing Shot Back

Yes, old dogs can learn new tricks...and new lessons, as well.  While 42 is by no means ancient, it is certainly not the ideal age to bust out the roller skates with the idea that 'it's just like riding a bike'.  It's not.  I mean it.

I recall freely flowing up and down the streets of our old neighborhood as a child, wind in my hair as I glided hither and thither, spinning, twirling, almost..but not quite...falling and bounding back up again to continue on my merry way.  I don't like to brag, but on our block I was the rollerskating version of Dorothy Hamill.  Don't know who she is?  Google it, you obnoxious little brat...you and your rap music and saggy jeans.  Get a job!  Ahem...anyway, I digress.  I really loved skating and I wore my skates at every opportunity.  Call me Tootie!  You've never heard of her either?  Youth.  Bah.

Funny things happen to a body as it ages.  Joints stiffen, balance becomes a bit more tenuous, and our pride is much more easily wounded than it was in our younger days.  So, when a sweet group of kids who think the WORLD of me asked me to go roller skate with them, in the street in front of our house, at 6:00 at night, in the dark, I was only too happy to oblige!  The twins and my niece and nephew had all donned their roller skates and were zipping up and down the driveway before dinner.  It was so cute and really, had I not been engrossed in helping prepare dinner and watching the Saints get ready to whip some Detroit Lions bahookie, I would have been out there warming up with them in the daylight.  Remember that fact.  Daylight is best for rollerskating.  Lesson #1.  Check.  When they asked me to put on my skates and come out with them, I thought to myself, "what's the harm? A few minutes of up and down the street and we'll all have a fun little memory to tuck away for later."  Yeah, right.

I must admit, I was a bit wobbly.  Ever since the twins were born, my balance has been less than stellar.  I first discovered it on a trip to Disneyland.  The Teacup Ride was NOT as fun as it used to be.  I didn't throw up, but WOW, did I have a tough time shaking that dizzying feeling.  It's a bummer, too, because I was one of those kids who found joy in spinning in circles endlessly just for the euphoric feeling that would follow.  Now, the only feeling I get can best be described as that morning after that party when I drank all that Grappa in the shed out by the peach orchard.

So, I summoned up a bit of courage, taking things slowly at first.  I knew if I wanted to make a habit of my return to skating, I'd have to adjust the trucks.  They were way too stiff.  Lesson #2.  Make sure your equipment is in good working condition.  Check.  I moved up and down the street, slowly gaining the courage to make a turn when the kids all began to inquire about my ability to skate backwards.  Could I do it?  Would I show them how to do it?  Well, yes I could and yes I would!!!  Lesson #3.  Don't let your mouth write checks your body can't cash.  Roger that.

The infamous piece of aggregate.

Yes, back in my younger days, I was quite the backwards skater.  We all were.  We had to be.  It was mandatory if you ever hit the 5-7 p.m. session at Roller World.  It was especially important if you wanted to couple-skate with that really cute guy with the feathered hair and cool comb in his back pocket.  So, knowing the trucks of my skates were much too tight, I took things slowly.  I showed the kids the basics of skating backwards.  Make sure you are looking behind you when necessary.  Check your feet.  Don't attempt the crossover until you practice more.  Oh, and watch out for that piece of aggregate in the road.  Yeah, that one right there....um...oops...too late.





Down I went, falling just like I did so many years ago.  Only, this time, something was different.  Oh, there it was...it was my wrist.  It was bent like a cartoon character's wrist would be right after he tried, rather unsuccessfully, to karate chop a board.

Hong Kong Phooey, number one Super Guy!

There was no question about it.  My LEFT arm was broken.  I felt bones grinding.  Sorry, I don't mean to be graphic, but truly, it was such a bizarre sensation.  Did I mention that this was the first time I'd ever broken a bone?  I instinctively pulled my hand away from my arm to alleviate the awkward sensation of my arm bending where no joint existed only moments earlier.  Luckily, I felt no pain.  Just serious discomfort.  I yelled to the kids to run inside and get dad because my arm was broken.  Little did I know that inside the house, not twenty seconds earlier, the following conversation was going on.

Maurice (the husband):  Where's Leanne?
Mike (my brother):  Oh, she's outside rollerskating with the kids.
Maurice:  Damn, she's gonna break her neck.
Mike:  Nah, she's actually a REALLY good skaterrrrrrr.......cut to front door opening and lots of yelling.
Kids:  Dad!  Mom broke her arm!  Come quick!

Pulled pork was in the crock pot, the Saints game was about to start and now I'm the reason that my brother and sister-in-law had to clean up my kitchen and babysit my kids that night and my husband missed dinner AND the entire game.  All I could think to do was continue to apologize to them.  Tracy pulled off my skates as I laid in the street.  She even put on my flip flops for me.  She's awesome, have I mentioned that before?  My brother kept reassuring me that everything was going to be okay.  He's so awesome, too.  He brought out the cookie sheet and a dish towel for me.  The cookie sheet kept my wrist straight and the dish towel covered the carnage I was not quite ready to see.  If you ever have to triage a broken arm, these two items are a must.  I don't care that the doctor and some of the nurses looked at me like I was a nut job when I explained their very important role in my care.  Jerks.  What did they know?  I found comfort, both physically and emotionally, because I had these items.  And my dear, sweet husband, who puts up with SO much from me and our spawn, he has a higher place in Heaven because of me and my antics.  He made fun of me all the way to the emergency room.  He made me bust out laughing when I clearly should have been freaking out.  He even answered questions for me when I asked, 'is this what it felt like when you broke your arm, leg, shoulder, foot'...fill in the blank, the boy is a hot mess of accidents.

I won't bore you with the ER garbage.  We all know how that goes down.  Wait right here...explain what happened (insert humiliation here), more waiting....on a scale of one to ten, how much pain are you experiencing, just hang on and the doctor will be in soon (repeated 47 times over the course of four hours)...let's get some vitals, wait some more...and then the morphine.  Blessed morphine turned what could have been a horrid experience into something fun and exciting!  It also calmed me enough to give me a moment of clarity.  My arm was starting to swell.  My finger was next in line.  Get the wedding ring off NOW!  Phew.

After a valiant attempt at a reduction, the doctor referred me to an orthopedic surgeon.  Surgery was necessary and thank the LORD for Facebook and good friends who referred me to Sierra Pacific Orthopedic!  A scant five days later, I was all stitched up, a new titanium plate and a few sassy little screws and zip ties holding together my arm and a good bit of my pride as well.

Less than 24 hours after the surgery, the husband went offshore, giving me yet another opportunity to challenge myself to do things without help.  Having one's dominant arm in a cast is a trial for another day, and another post, so stay tuned for my tips and tricks for using your non-dominant hand in times of trouble (shaving your pits), amusement (signing your kid's homework) or boredom (crocheting with your foot).  It's sure to be an amusing read, if I do say so myself.

This is after the attempt at the reduction.
Yep, that is NOT fixed.  Time for surgery.

All my bling.  And it just looks nicer, don't you think?

A rare moment of unwrapped joy.  Time to scratch that itch!

Black is slimming.

So, all in all, not a horrible experience.  Insurance covered more than I thought they would and the surgeon didn't charge nearly as much as I thought he would.  Lesson learned and Lord willing, I'll be off to physical therapy with my baby sister-in-law in the weeks to come (yet another fun post just waiting to unfold)!  I can't wait to supinate!






Funny side note...as I'm having a cast put on after surgery, I'm explaining to Gene, the orthopedic technologist, how this all went down.  He proceeds to tell me he grew up rollerskating at a place called Roller World...up in Concord, CA.  We grew up two miles from each other.  Probably skated past each other a few times on a long-ago summer night rollerskating session.  Small world.  Roller World. Shoot the duck, my friends.  Shoot that damned duck.

I Can't Crochet

I love to crochet.  It's something I've always enjoyed doing, and with the advent of the internet and sites like Pinterest, it's even more exciting to see all the possibilities that exist in the world of yarn.

But, when your arm is in a cast, your wrist can't move and your fingers can't really hold onto that hook correctly, it's so frustrating to come across a new pattern you want to try, or a yarn you just HAVE to make into socks.  I think that says just how I'm feeling today.

So, while I wait for my wrist (and my pride) to heal, I'm going to take a few moments to showcase a few of my projects here.  Call it therapy, call it withdrawal, call it boredom.  And if you see anything you like, call me and I'll be happy to add your project to the list I'll be joyfully tackling when I regain full use of my arm!

On the right, I show you a heart I made before the break.
On the left, my sad attempt after the break.  Broken arm, broken heart.

This isn't the greatest picture, but the yarn is OH SO SOFT and perfect for baby blankets.  This one was made for my newest nephew, Ty.  I'm pretty sure he loves it more than any other blanket in the universe.

So, I had a bunch of leftover yarn and the twins asked me to make them some hearts.  I love making hearts.  A few weeks ago, I even bought red, pink and white yarn to make lots of hearts for a Valentine's scarf, but well...you saw how my hearts are turning out lately.  Ugh.  

I also tried tackling an infinity cowl.  It was tough, I'm not gonna lie.  Trying to keep the yarn from twisting is tough.  I started over several times on this one.  My daughter loves it, though, so I can't get rid of it and start over.  She even had me add a few hearts to it...just for decoration.

I think, though, my favorite scarf to crochet ist he corkscrew scarf.  It's easy to make and fun to look at!  

I even like how they look all rolled up.  Fun!

So, here I sit, staring at piles of yarn that can't come to life until this ridiculous cast comes off.  I suppose the least I could do is roll it into balls so it's ready to go when I am.  Sigh.